Feedback Thoughts
Why It's So Hard to Hear Negative Feedbackby Tim Herrera
New York Times, March 2018.
by Unnamed Writer
Impraise, 2020.
Why is it so hard to hear feedback? It isn't just negative feedback that leaves one's heart racing. Walking into a performance meeting or opening an essay containing feedback response without knowing whether the feedback is going to be positive or negative feels more overwhelming than being certain that the feedback will be negative. Tim Herrera's article identifies the primary issue. Humans evolved to have this anxiety. It's a survival instinct. Fortunately, neuroscientists and psychologists have done extensive research over whether humans can retrain their brains to turn off their conflict avoidance presets when approached with feedback. The short answer is: yes!
However, the above articles do not discuss maladaptive personality disorders such as avoidant personality disorder and rejection sensitive dysphoria. While humans are naturally predisposed to conflict avoidance, these disorders amplify the intensity of an individual's emotional response to conflict which causes the individual to go to social extremes in order to avoid the possibility of conflict. While APD and RSD share many of the same symptoms, they are very different.
APD is believed to be genetically predisposed and triggered by environmental influences such as emotional abuse, prolonged rejection by caretakers and/or peers, and PTSD. APD only affects around 2.5% of the population.
RSD, however, is a symptom of other mental disorders such as ADHD, PTSD, OCD, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, and most forms of depression, anxiety, and social phobias. RSD causes intense feelings that mimic APD, but the feelings are shorter in duration. RSD can be reduced by proper treatment of the primary disorder.
Although APD and RSD should be treated and monitored by a medical professional, taking active steps to create new habits and behaviors, like those suggested in Overcoming the Fear of Feedback, should be part of an ongoing treatment plan.
